How to Use Frustration to Gain Happiness

Frustration is one of those things that none of us want to feel. It feels yucky, uncomfortable and miserable. No one ever wants to feel any of these emotions right? But did you know that frustration, although it may be associated with negative emotions, can lead to your true happiness?

Frustration is a good thing in the sense that it takes you out of your place of contentment and into a place where you try to understand where you need to be going in life. You would think that it is important to be content in life because when you are content you are happy with where you are in life. This couldn’t be further from the truth. What you need is gratitude for what you have.

Contentment vs. Gratitude

Happy boys

Contentment can make you complacent. I want to clarify that there is nothing wrong with being fine with what you have or where you are in life. The problem is when being content is mistaken with being grateful. Being grateful is very different from being content because being grateful means that you genuinely appreciate what you have been given and where you are in life. If while being grateful, you still feel frustrated, please know there is nothing wrong with this. It just means your soul is telling you to start paying attention to something you have been neglecting.

The Benefits of Frustration

Frustration calls your attention and makes you take a closer look at what is going on in your life. Think about it for a second; if you are content where you are, you’re not going to feel the need to look within you to see what else there is for you in your life. The sense of frustration takes you out of your comfort zone and rings alarm bells for you to take action.

Frustration doesn’t necessarily mean that there is something wrong with your life. It can just mean that there is an area that may be neglected or that it’s time for a change. Change is great because it leads to growth and growth is vital for your well-being.

When you look inside you, it leads to self-discovery. Knowing who you are will give you a sense of direction. We all need direction in life because direction leads to purpose. Having a purpose in life gives your life a sense of meaning which is so crucial for your overall health.

How to Make Frustration Work for You

Frustrated and stressed boy

When feeling frustrated, embrace your frustration. Don’t try to repress or deny it. Accept that you feel this way. Accepting it doesn’t mean that you like the way you feel, it just means that you say to yourself: “I feel this way and that’s the way it is”. Don’t fight it because fighting it means you are resisting and resistance makes it worse.

Do your best to understand why you feel frustrated. Ask yourself as many questions as you can in order to get to the bottom of it. Someone once told me that the mind is like a Google search engine where if you ask it a question, it will give you answers and this is so true. The more questions you ask yourself about your feelings of frustration, the more you will understand why you feel this way and what actions you need to undertake.

Figure out what would have to be different in order for you to feel happy. This will really help you understand what you need to do and what steps to take in order for you to be in that place in your life where you want to be. When you think about what would make you happy, you have the end in mind and it is just a matter of taking the necessary steps to get there.

If you don't like where you are move. You are not a tree.

Make sure you take the steps required to ensure your happiness. If you know what would make you happy and all you do instead is just remain in that state of frustration, the knowledge that you have means nothing. It’s not just understanding what makes you frustrated that helps; taking action to get to a point of happiness is equally important. Nothing can be achieved without taking action.

Next time you feel any “negative” emotion, remember that it’s your soul calling you to take action. That emotion is just feedback that is being provided to you from your soul which is your true essence. Remember that frustration doesn’t have to be a bad thing. If you pay close attention to that feeling of frustration, it can ultimately lead you to your happiness.

Let us know about your battle with frustration and comment below. We highly appreciate it.

Aura Martinez

Aura Elena Martinez is a Wellness and Life Coach, Blogger and Writer, owner and founder of Live to the Max™

Aura Elena Martinez is a Wellness and Life Coach, Blogger and Writer, owner and founder of Live to the Max™/Viva al máximo™, who encourages others to live their fullest in every way, the way they are meant to be.

To be inspired or to contact Aura, visit or you can follow her on Twitter, you can also follow her online radio show at  or you can follow on Instagram @AuraEMartinez.

26 thoughts on “How to Use Frustration to Gain Happiness

  1. Thought-provoking post. I realize that when I’m too content, I find myself looking for something I may have been neglecting, as you mentioned. But that arises from gratitude, not frustration. It is a case of, “I can’t believe how lucky I am” rather than “I’m frustrated and something needs to change.” While frustration can be the impetus for positive changes relative to careers and relationships for example, sometimes frustration means we are struggling to come to terms with where we are in our lives relative to aging, financial boundaries or other areas we simply need to accept. As the saying goes, “Have the courage to change the things we can, accept the things we can’t, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

    • You are right, frustration can come because of many reasons and it is important to understand what that reason is. And yes, in life it’s so important to accept certain changes of life that may be frustrating. I thank you so much for talking the time to comment! Love reading your comment! 🙂

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